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The truth is so dazzling I had to wear shades
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Clearly my quest to shine the light of truth into the darkest corners of historical propaganda-fiction is having some effect. At SALUTE 2016 I was lobbied by several members of the pro-Johnno faction for my criminally pitiless pursuit of one of England's national treasures St John of Churchill. They were serious too!
Why oh why must I persist in this smear campaign? You are being unfair! Grown men are vexed. Teeth were gnashed. I was told that we Jocks should have been given f***ing independence to shut me up!
Deeply ironic that last remark as my few remaining friends will attest. And of course it rather fails to appreciate the point that we Jocks were the only ones voting on the separation issue! Bearing in mind current laws on hate crime I may just have a case there so beware.
OK, so I showed your article to a friend who is a real Marlborough fanatic and he admitted that in a lot of cases you are actually right... but he said you were morally wrong to pick on the poor chap so please stop doing it.
That one I particularly loved!
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| Colleagues at work gave me this which I now put to good use (the pachyderm not the Fallen Idol) |
MARLPOLOGIST (n) : One who slavishly espouses the virtues of England's premier opportunist in the face of all logical counter argumentation and evidence.
I intend to deploy it occasionally as the need presents itself and when I fear the world will be swept away on a tsunami of 1984 inspired doublespeak adulation of the Big Chancer.
Should I rename my mission The Elephant in the Room quest? Everybody knows what he was like but he was such a popular chap that we must ignore almost any magnitude of indiscretion and excuse it away because he makes some of us feel good.
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| Who IS that, King Billy? No actually it's St John - ON MY WALL! |
Now here is a shock. The above picture hangs above my office desk. I know, I know. You can't believe it can you? It amuses me greatly particularly when BT engineers. joiners or delivery men visit the house, look at it and think I am some kind of sectarian bigot.
Ah! you say (if you're from a distance greater than 50 miles radius of Weegie-town) what does this mean?
Just follow the West of Scotland logic stream.. my surname does not begin with Mc, Mac or O' , I have a painting of a man in a red tunic on a white horse in my office, ergo... I am a member of a Protestant extremist organization because of course....
the man in the painting is King Billy! King Billy, the only man in history ever to wear a red coat and ride a white horse or so the story goes in these parts.
It is a local and wonderful talent to be able to apply such laser-guided logic. The Wild West has been run on these lines for about 300 years now. Immediate friend to some, enemy to others... if only life was so simple.
Does the above evidence confound my critics? Am I really a crypto-Marlpologist? This could actually mean I am to him what he was to James II. In the modern world of conspiracy theories this fits perfectly.
Peter, friend, frequent contributor to the blog and long time Marlbrook fan boy has agreed to pen a counter argument piece. I have happily agreed to blog that on his behalf and look forward to its appearance. I will not spoil Peter's line in argumentation but was amused by the altruistic picture of St John he was peddling at Salute. All that avarice and deception was for others not for himself was the cry. It is rumoured that St John was the founder of UNICEF and Oxfam (well according to Toggy Bob). Now Peter, you should be a politician.
Thanks for all the reaction, I love it really and wouldn't life be really dull if we all agreed with each other.
I will subscribe to the parting remark of at least two Marlpoligists on Saturday.... he was a man of his time..
Yes indeed, we can All of us agree on that!
PS: For those conspiracy theorists out there wondering whether the crypto-Marlpologist rumour is in fact true based on my curious ownership of #44 of 500 of the WI Miniature of St John, I was awarded (somewhat ironically) it by WI for services to the Marlborough debate. Thanks for that Wayne...
I think you get my angle of approach.
As a footnote to this ongoing saga of angst, bile and spin I was accosted by the Famous David Imrie at the recent Carronade Show in Falkirk. He insisted on presenting me with yet another Lundy like effigy of St John and then photographing me holding it. He further twisted the tourniquet by sending me the photographic evidence which I share with you here. I did notice that HIS unique numbered St John was way higher than mine in the series..... 96 I believe.
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| Just ONE? says a distraught Scrivener |